Tools in communication are what makes or breaks any career. Imagine thinking before you react! Imagine not waiting to speak until you are really, really ready! Imagine not putting off actions that scare you. Imagine being afraid and taking actions anyway. Imagine accomplishing something good in every interaction.
The tools and the approach you choose enable you to:
This tool takes care of the moment you need to count on yourself and you can't. When you need to be present and you can't see straight. It feels like a film is over your eyes and you have foggy vision. Your heart is pounding way beyond butterflies. Like an alien creature has landed on your face. This only happens when the stakes are high. Good for you that you put yourself in a risky situation. The tool? One simple sentence that you say to yourself; "There's that thing that I do!" As soon as you say that, the ALIEN slips off your face, your body automatically regroups and you begin to breathe. You are present and ready to focus. This takes 3 - 5 seconds! The reason it works? It works because you have acknowledged that you are wearing your anxiety on your face and you didn't know it, and you have separated yourself from that awful feeling and you were holding your breath. Have fun with this one!
What is YOUR Competitive Edge? This tool is not about competing or being aggressive. This tool is about being yourself when you think "they" want someone else. It's about finding a part of you that you can compete from. How do you find it? Ask yourself, your friends or your family what it is about you that they count on? It could be common sense, responsibility, kindness, humor, and the way you listen. After you've taken a poll, you will discover a theme. I know you want to hear that you compete from talent, sex appeal, or great schmoozing. You may have all those elements. I'm talking about when you are scared and all those cool characteristics go out the window. That is the time to rely on what works organically about you. When you focus on your Competitive Edge, you remember who you are and you will provide whatever you want. It only takes a moment to remember who you are and why you are loved.
This tool reminds you to pursue your dreams from a healthy place. Let's say that there is a negative and a positive side of us. The negative side holds the feelings, thoughts, superstitions and tangible losses. The positive side holds all the good, true, tangible characteristics and wins. It's you on a day when everything works. You become ageless, fearless, happy and free. The problem? Most of us lean on the negative side and try to pursue what we want over the losses. It's called "unhealthy pursuit". It's filled with "trying" and "hope". The tool? Picture the negative side and the positive side. Physically shift your body one inch and lean into the positive side. It's a visual and physical tool. Perfect for creative professionals. When you are in the positive side, you pursue from "healthy pursuit"! We never deny the negative side but we don't want to operate from there. This takes about 10 seconds to put you on the power side.
The quickest way to turn someone off, screw up an audition, lose in a negotiation, fail at a pitch is when you talk too much. It's how you get a bad reputation for arrogance. It's why people look away after a while. It's why you may not get called back. This is so simple and so hard. When people get nervous they try too hard to impress. They talk too much, talk too loud, sweat, and hyperventilate. The quest to be interesting is up and running. The problem? You are trying to be INTERESTING! It sounds like a monologue. Nobody is included. The tool? You guessed it, LISTEN! Be INTERESTED! Authentically interested. The meeting is like a dance. Everyone participates. It takes courage not to push. It means you need to stand for what you have and who you are, and that it is enough.